As a child I always sat in lotus, not just crossed legs… full lotus. There wasn’t anything yogic about it at the time… I just liked to sit like that. As I entered my teens, it started becoming uncomfortable and by my early 20s was no longer possible. Every few months, I would revisit but it was completely inaccessible to me and eventually I gave up trying and considered it lost to my childhood. In 2012, when I started on my journey of rebirth, I was forced to face demons that I had buried within me and that was when I discovered the connection between my physical body and the manifestation of my locked emotions. The realisation that the tightening of my hips started at the same time as my eating disorders, the continuation of tightening corresponding to other physical and emotional traumas that I experienced in my life. About 3 years ago, I attempted lotus again and even though, I felt that I had made significant progress towards facing my demons and my physical body felt more open, I was still dealing with an incredible level of daily stress and the pose continued to elude me.
I started teaching yoga full time almost 2 years ago and the benefits to my well-being, my peace of mind and my emotional state have been mind-blowing. So imagine my shock when I attempt lotus and it happened… I wasn’t expecting it, had let go of the attachment to achieving it, and it happened. I literally sat there thinking “this can’t be lotus… how did this happen??” I may not be able to do a handstand, my poses may sometimes be awkward and wobbly, I may often prefer child’s pose… but my emotional state has made a breakthrough and from that, only beauty and inspiration can emerge 💞
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